February 8, 2021

Health and Wellness

How to Heal From a Breakup

Breakups are a part of life. Some people marry their high school sweethearts and stay together for the rest of their lives. But, these are rare occurrences. Most people have a heartbreak or two. It can be challenging to heal from a breakup. But, it’s possible. It’s natural when you lose somebody special to you to feel sad, especially if you have abandonment issues. Breakups can trigger any kind of psychological problems that you already have. Even for the most emotionally healthy person, it’s difficult to heal from a breakup, but your ways that you can manage these emotions and find a way to heal.

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Stop romanticizing your relationship.

There were reasons you broke up. Stop romanticizing your relationship. When you break up with somebody, it’s tempting to just remember the good times. But there are reasons that you don’t want to be with this person. It’s crucial to recall these reasons. When you start feeling sad about the good times, you can acknowledge that those were beautiful moments. But, remember that you didn’t want to be with this person for a variety of reasons. Or, if you were broken up with, your ex chose to do this. Don’t beg someone to be with you if they don’t want that. You deserve a partner who wants you for you! It is especially important to let go of a relationship if it was a toxic dynamic. If the person was abusive or cruel, that is the main reason that you didn’t want to be together. But then there are instances when it wasn’t an abusive relationship and the person, and you were just not compatible. Whatever the reasons, it’s important to remind yourself of those reasons so that you know why you broke up.

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The no contact rule

Even if you were dating your best friend, it’s essential not to contact the person you broke up with after you separate. You need a period of time to heal. And talking to each other is like putting salt in a wound. You’re reminding yourself of what you’re missing. After connecting with them, you’ll end up feeling more pain because you’re tricking yourself. You probably want to feel like you’re still with that person. A break up is tough because it’s a loss, but the person is still there. It’s not like somebody died. If a person died, you could eventually accept the fact that they’re gone. But with a breakup, the person is still living. It’s just that you are not in a romantic connection together. It’s vital that you create some space with this person and not speak to them for a while. That way, both of you have some time to heal. It doesn’t mean you won’t talk to them forever, but it needs to be for right now.

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What if my ex keeps contacting me? What do I do?

If your ex does not respect your boundaries when it comes to no contact, it’s crucial to reiterate those limits. You need the chance to heal from this breakup, and so do they. It’s time to stop worrying about their feelings and focus on your own. Let them know that you need space. You’re not cruel by telling them that. It doesn’t matter who broke up with who. You both need time to heal, and it’s time to focus on yourself. You’re no longer in a relationship, and now it’s time to better your own life. So if they try contacting you, whether it’s via text, email, phone call, or carrier pigeon, it doesn’t matter they need to stop. And if they don’t stop, you can ignore them. If it comes down to it and they are harassing you and not respecting your boundaries, you can block them. But that is the last resort. Be clear with your limits and remind them that you need space.

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Let yourself feel your feelings

You will go through a variety of emotions during a breakup. You may be angry, sad, anxious, or confused. There’s no wrong way to feel during a breakup. It is legitimately a loss, and you need to process those feelings. Don’t let anybody tell you that your feelings are wrong. Even if you slip up and contact your ex or have a long conversation with them, you didn’t do anything wrong. Just remember that you need to do what’s best for you. And nobody can tell you what that is. He can help to write in a journal to process your feelings, or you might want to speak to a therapist.

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Online therapy

Online therapy is an excellent place to get support after a breakup. You can talk through any issues you have with a skilled therapist. You don’t have to suffer through these issues alone. It can help to have a therapist who is there for you. You can message them between sessions and get live support. There’s no rule as to how long it takes to heal from a breakup or how many sessions it takes to get through it in therapy. You get to see your therapist for as long as you need to see them. Read more about that here. Don’t be afraid to reach out for support when you’re struggling. Online therapy can help you heal from this trauma.

 

Biography of the Author

Marie Miguel has been a writing and research expert for nearly a decade, covering a variety of health- related topics. Currently, she is contributing to the expansion and growth of a free online mental health resource with BetterHelp.com. With an interest and dedication to addressing stigmas associated with mental health, she continues to specifically target subjects related to anxiety and depression.

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